For me, December should be the international month for not knowing what Christmas presents to buy, and for burning out. It’s when departments have to submit their yearly reports, yearly budgets, and yearly plans. It’s when developers (and employees in general) have to contribute to these reports, serve day-to-day requests, and satisfy urgent requirements that someone forgot about didn’t have the time to push for during the year, and are only remembering now cause there are those reports, right? That’s the general case, then there’s the Lebanese case, where, on top of that, people have spent the year mitigating disaster after another, have been dealing with continuously rusting infrastructure, and are creating their make-shift infrastructure to continue providing for their families and loved ones, especially coming towards some of the coldest and rather destructive months of the year.
December is also about joy, buying presents, and showcasing your love to others, but:
1. That’s not the point of this article, and
2. This should be an everyday affair; for some reason, humans decided to only use December (and Valentine’s day?) to advertise that.
Those new in the market might not be very well-acquainted with the concept of burnout. Let me try to make you relate.
First of all, burning out is not necessarily a bad thing. How you perceive burnout and cater to it sets the room for it being a bad or a good thing.
But What is It?
Burn-out is a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed - Someone from the WHO
Since I don’t like formal definitions, here’s mine: If, unnaturally to your common state of mind, progressively or suddenly, you find yourself:
Unable to work or enjoy work
You usually enjoy your job and performing your tasks, but you’ve slowly gotten to a point where you have absolutely no energy or desire to do what you usually do.Unusually disoriented
You usually know what your next steps are, and how to plan your day, week, or month, but you now can’t see your north star. You’d feel as if you’ve lost your compass, or you don’t know if you’re headed in the right direction in the first place. Maybe scrambling to finalize those #NewYearNewMe bullet points.Constantly irritated and/or having irrational reactions
You usually have some patience towards people, events, triggers, news, etc., but you now find yourself easily triggered and quite controlled by your emotions.Self-doubt and/or lacking purpose
You usually have a certain degree of confidence, whether towards your life in general, or the day-to-day tasks you perform, knowing well that they are serving your overall best interest, but you suddenly question those, question your direction, and question your decisions1.Lower quality of sleep
You notice a change in your sleep routine (quality, times, energy after waking up, etc.), and no matter how long or how well you’re sleeping, you don’t feel as charged and energized as you normally would.Not enjoying your personal time
You usually disconnect from work when you stop working, but you now feel it’s still taking its toll on you when you’re with your family, hanging out with your friends, and doing day-to-day things that have absolutely nothing to do with work.Building a hut in the Tibets
You find yourself imagining a life in the middle of nowhere, where no one or nothing can reach you except for some trees, a couple of ducks, and a dog.
Then, and depending on the intensity of these symptoms, you’re likely either headed for burning out, are already burning out, or have finished entirely burning out and are now a walking piece of coal.
Have you experienced similar or other symptoms?
Update - 08/12/2022 - Some readers have asked for a link to a test to figure out if they might be burning out. Here’s one from Psych Central.
How Do I Fix It?
Psych - this is a misleading title. Can’t fix something without understanding the root causes so, let’s dig into this first.
You can do all sorts of Googling and research for “What causes burning out?”, but you’ll get generic answers. To really know what’s been burning you out, whether it’s related to work, family, partner, life choices, etc., you first have to be extremely honest with yourself.
Let’s face it, we’re humans who don’t like to be told that something’s wrong with what we’re doing. But the first step in fixing the caveats contributing to your burning out is to understand that your ego is trying to protect you and is actually harming you in the process. So put it aside, ask yourself the important questions, and firmly and boldly answer those questions as honestly as you can. Let me give you a generic head-start; some of these are the things that have led to me personally burning out over the years:
Continuously sprinting
You’ve been constantly overworking; Your brain is used to operating with a certain load of work within a specific timeframe (your personal optimal load), but you’ve constantly been exceeding that load.Bonus points if you’ve been doing that without a properly healthy coping mechanism (e.g., not taking breaks).
Lacking appreciation
If you’re an employer/manager reading this, it’s about time you realized your employees do work for you to get a salary (the basis of not enslaving people) but they stay for more than that. You’re more likely to burn out if you feel like most of your work is going under the radar, unappreciated, unaccounted for. You don’t want to be looking for a babysitter constantly giving you outside validation2, but you'd value a “job well done” notification on Teams once you’ve fixed that critical bug.Lacking purpose/control
Whether you’re lacking personal purpose, not knowing where you’re headed, or collective purpose, not knowing where your company or department is headed, humans generally enjoy less fog while cruising life. You might feel like you don’t know where you’re headed, and you have little-to-no control over circumstances. This might double down on you especially if you’re exposed to today’s news and are susceptible to its effects.Plateauing and/or losing interest
You might have learned everything you needed to learn there. You might have reached the point where your leads are no longer a positive contribution to your career and growth. You might even feel that you’ve lost interest in the company itself, the business model, or even your entire career path (borderline identity crisis). That’s absolutely fine; it’s you telling yourself there’s something even better for you that you need to go for.Toxic environment
Almost every work environment is prone to having one form or another of toxicity. Toxicity comes in all shapes and magnitudes, and, to an extent, is opinionated3; but no two people could argue that a shouting boss constantly threatening to lay someone off, a colleague who spends their time plotting your ousting, or a non-sympathizing manager who can't assess your current load and circumstances and constantly demands extra deliverables, are traits of an inherently toxic environment.
There are many more reasons why you might be burning out, and make sure to add your own in the comments. The key is for you to genuinely ask yourself the questions you need to ask yourself and make the effort towards giving yourself the hard answers you might not usually give. Talking to someone also helps, a lot. Whether it’s a therapist, a friend, or your direct manager or colleague, having an outside view of the entanglement that’s happening in your brain is always helpful. Especially you, men; speak, open up, express. That’s fine.
Now Seriously, How Do I Fix It
For me, it’s not a universal to-do list with items to check, it’s more of a process that you could fine-tune to what suits you best.
First of all, drop everything you’re doing. No seriously. Drop everything. Relax your shoulders, and tell yourself that you’re burning out. Allow yourself to admit you’re tired. I sometimes fall into the trap of refusing to admit it, but it needs to be accepted.
Second, and for a few days, do the things you’ve been telling yourself you won’t do. You’ve started blocking time to read a book? Drop the book, and enjoy some TikTok. Started going to the gym? Skip, call Malek el Tawou2 and stuff your face in that extra garlic sandwich. Started an AWS course? Forget the course, binge some Netflix, and try to avoid drama. The point of this stage is to spray yourself with some dopamine. You need it. But scope it, limit it.
Third, pinpoint the reason if it’s not obvious. Get a pen and paper, dump your brain, and ask yourself:
What’s been bothering you?
What can you do to fix it?
When will you do it?
It’s important to set due dates and show up for those expectations. We can easily procrastinate things, but setting expectations will give you a better drive to own up to them. It’s fine if you miss some deadlines but constantly work towards them.
Bonus, if you have a considerate lead or manager, reach out to them. It’s always important to showcase to your seniors what it is that you’re going through. Break the stigma that makes you think you’re less capable if you ask for help. It’s important for you to know when to reach out for help.
Finally, rest, and pick back up at your own pace. Be careful, though, you don’t want to fall victim to the second phase; it could get addicting (cheap dopamine is a son of a.). Try to set a reasonable, but not too comfortable, deadline for your resting phase, and start doing the changes you need to change.
You need to keep in mind that the changes you might need to make aren’t going to be the easiest. They’re not going to give you an overnight reward. So, depending on your circumstances, decide on the pace and intensity with which you will make steady, progressive change, towards having the routine, environment, and mindset, that will serve you towards reaching your north star and make sure it doesn’t burn you in the process.
You’ve probably done a great deal this year. Rest up, you’ve got a new one to take on soon.
Bonus point for overthinkers: Maybe even questioning your entire existence and being, contemplating whether aliens a few galaxies away might be going through the same things?
There’s a fine line between seeking appreciation, and seeking outside validation. One is healthy, the other is toxic; do some research about it.
Someone might find a high-stress work environment toxic, and someone else might actually thrive in it.